When someone texts you “Tell me a joke,” it’s your time to shine! Whether you want to be silly, sarcastic, clever, or a little flirty, the right joke or response can keep the convo fun and playful. Don’t just drop a random dad joke—pick a reply that matches your mood and vibe.
[Classic and Clean Jokes] — Light-hearted and safe for everyone
- Why don’t scientists trust atoms? Because they make up everything.
- What do you call fake spaghetti? An impasta.
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? He was outstanding in his field.
- What did the ocean say to the beach? Nothing, it just waved.
- Why don’t skeletons fight each other? They don’t have the guts.
- What do you call cheese that isn’t yours? Nacho cheese.
- How does a penguin build its house? Igloos it together.
- What do you get when you cross a snowman and a dog? Frostbite.
- I told my computer I needed a break… and it froze.
- Why can’t your nose be 12 inches long? Because then it would be a foot.
[Sarcastic or Witty Replies] — For dry humor or a sassy tone
- Sure, but I charge per laugh.
- I would, but I left my stand-up mic at home.
- You’re looking at the joke—me replying to this.
- Can’t top your last message, sorry.
- I only tell jokes after 5 PM. It’s the rules.
- You first. Let’s see what you’ve got.
- Only if you promise to laugh—even if it’s bad.
- My joke is this conversation.
- Warning: jokes may cause eye rolls.
- I’m not funny. I’m just cute.
[Flirty and Playful Replies] — Mix in charm and cheeky fun
- I’d tell you a joke, but I’d rather make you smile in person.
- Are you the setup or the punchline? Because this feels like a flirt.
- Only if I get your number after.
- I must be the joke—because you just made me nervous.
- Knock knock. (You say who’s there?)
- My joke? Falling for you too fast.
- How about I tell you a joke over coffee sometime?
- I could… but I’d rather hear you laugh first.
- Is this your way of flirting? Because it’s working.
- You want a joke? Okay… me pretending not to like you.
[Short and Funny One-Liners] — Easy to text and quick to laugh at
- I’m on a seafood diet. I see food and I eat it.
- I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high. She looked surprised.
- Parallel lines have so much in common… it’s a shame they’ll never meet.
- I used to play piano by ear, now I use my hands.
- I asked the librarian if the library had books on paranoia. She whispered, “They’re right behind you.”
- I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.
- I used to be indecisive… now I’m not sure.
- I’m great at multitasking. I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
- I told a joke about chemistry, but there was no reaction.
- The future, the present, and the past walked into a bar. Things got tense.
Tips for Responding to “Tell Me a Joke”
- Match the mood – Keep it light or flirty based on who’s asking.
- Go short – Quick jokes work best in text.
- Add personality – Your humor style matters—dry, silly, punny, or cheeky.
- Have a few saved – A quick laugh can keep conversations going.
- Know your audience – Clean for coworkers, cheeky for crushes, goofy for friends.
Conclusion
Whether you’re being funny, flirty, or just a goofball, replying to “Tell me a joke” is your chance to charm. Pick a style that fits your vibe and have fun with it!
